Distracted Parenting

Ok, this one might get a little heated...

I saw yet another article today about a toddler who was left in a car and died.  All I can think is WHY AND HOW DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING?  Have we gotten so wrapped in our own personal bubble that we can’t even take care of our own offspring anymore?  We are controlled by our cell phones and devices and never leave home (or the car or the commode) without them but we can’t remember to grab our kids out of the damn car?

I’m a parent.  I know exactly what it’s like to be running on no sleep for 2 days while having to drop the kidlet off, run errands, work 9 hours, retrieve the kidlet, run more errands, and safely deliver everyone and everything home.  I get it, adulting is hard work, but NEVER ever ever have I forgotten my kid in the car...

As a general rule, my kid is priority numero uno.  Has been since the day I found out I was pregnant.  Nothing else is ever nearly as important as his safety and well-being.  Again, as a parent, I cannot for the life of me figure out how parents “accidentally” leave their child in a vehicle and go on about their day.  You “accidentally” leave your wallet or your sunglasses in the car (God forbid you leave your phone in the car...you’d run back at cheetah speed to get that...) but you don’t “accidentally” leave your child in the car.  If you can’t handle the responsibility of ensuring your child’s safety, maybe you shouldn’t have one.  There, I said it.  You may all get mad and quit reading now if you choose...

If you are still here, cool.  I am going to continue rambling on for a minute about how devices control us and our children annoy us...when it should be the other way around. I’m not tooting my own horn here and I definitely don’t qualify for the parent of the year award, BUT I can say that I am aware of my child at all times and I am always aware of the responsibility I have to care for him.  

Now I love my technology as much as the next guy but there is a time and place to let it consume my brain cells one by one.  That time is NOT when I have the responsibility of ensuring my child’s safety.  Sure, when we are safe at home for the night and he is busy building some crazed ninja warship with the 1,285,899 Legos he has, then I’m all about trolling Facebook and checking out the newest Instagram fad.

People, please please please, quit being distracted, mentally-absent parents and TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS.  “I forgot” is not an excuse for leaving your kid in the car...EVER.  If you are the forgetful type, set an alarm on your cell phone (because as we already covered, you are never without it) or write a note for yourself and put it on the dashboard of the car.  If you are distracted, tell someone you are so that they can help keep you in check.  Do whatever you have to do make sure you DON’T forget about your kid.  I swear if I see one more article about a child dying in a hot car I’m going to lose my mind.  For the love of God (and your children), pay attention, be attentive, be present, BE A PARENT!

For the Love...

Don’t let that title fool you…I mean it in every sarcastic way possible.  I mean really…shouldn’t we celebrate our love for each other EVERY day??  Perhaps I am a bit humbug-ish about it but allow me to explain…

For years now we (and by “we” I mean full grown, fairly intelligent adults) have all been tricked into thinking this is a holiday.  If it’s a true holiday, shouldn't the banks, schools, and every U.S. government agency on the planet be closed?  Wait a minute, that would mean I should get a day off for it too…of course, this year, it’s on a Saturday so technically we are off…but I digress…

Anyway, why aren't we acting out of love EVERY day??? Each moment with someone special (or anyone for that matter) should be treated as a special occasion because you never know if it will be the last one you get.

In my travels through the suck-you-in-so-deep-you-can-never-escape vacuum of social media today, I came across so many mushy, pink heart speckled, over the top cyber displays of affection I almost hurled.  Of course I’m being very cynical right now for the fun of it but I think I’m on to something.

Let me use my own relationship as an example.  I personally don’t care too much for all of the hullabaloo surrounding February 14^th.  My husband and I express our love for each other on a daily basis so it really makes no sense to devote a whole day to doing it.  I never want him to feel obliged to buy me flowers, stuffed animals, chocolates, or whatever else because it’s Valentine’s Day.  Buy me flowers on a random day in May if you want, or take me to dinner on a Wednesday…it’s much better when it’s totally unexpected and unobligated.

Now I can totally appreciate the fact that this year, V-day is on a Saturday and that means most of us have the day and night off to actually spend with our significant others.  By all means, take advantage of the time you can spend together, but don’t do it because the calendar says it’s a holiday.  Let’s take just a moment to determine how this “holiday” even came to be…

According to the History Channel, Valentine’s Day began many many moons ago as a pagan ritual in which an animal was sacrificed and then strips of its bloody skin were used to spank young women.  This was done to bring them fertility.  Hmm, that’s awkward…

Later in the year 3 A.D., the romans were engaged in battle (of course…) and the ruler, Claudius, didn’t want his men distracted by love and marriage.  The priest that went to battle with the troops, Father Valentine, was banned from performing marriages.  However he secretly continued to perform marriages for young lovers, against the emperor’s wishes.  The emperor grew wise to this and sentenced Father Valentine to death.  It is said that many of the young lovers that he married would visit him in prison and bring him flowers and gifts as tokens of their appreciation.  Legend has it that Father Valentine fell in love with his jailer’s daughter and on the day of his execution, left her a note.  That note closed with “From your Valentine.”  And so from that, our current interpretation of Valentine’s Day evolved.

Enough with the history lesson…back to the real issue here.  These days, holidays are all about money, and another factoid I learned from the History Channel is that retailers reign in roughly fourteen billion, that’s $14,000,000,000 (9 zeros, count them…), in cash every year just for Valentine’s Day!  Holy shiz people, that’s a metric truckload of cash right there…and for what?  A box of sugar that will take a month to recover from and flowers that will die in a week?  I’ve got an idea, save your money and express your love by the little things that you do for each other EVERY SINGLE DAY!!! (ß That’s my “I’m yelling at my computer” font J)

Ok, to switch to the other side for a moment…I LOVE fresh flowers.  I love even more when I receive fresh flowers from my other half.  What I absolutely do NOT love is that on this day, a nice bouquet of flowers and maybe a nice vase to put them in costs around 60-100 dollars, with delivery.  Any other random time of the year, that same nice arrangement of flowers and vase would top out at about 40 bucks, if that!  And those chocolates?  Don’t even get me started there…my husband knows better than to buy me chocolate because I won’t eat it.  He knows the way to my heart, and it’s definitely not in wasting money on things I won’t enjoy.

Don’t get me wrong, I love date night as much as the next girl, but I don’t want either one of us to ever feel like we HAVE to do something special for the other.  I like it so much more when my hubs helps out around the house, or allows me to take a Saturday afternoon nap even though he’s the one that worked 60 plus hours in a week, or my favorite: when my feet are cold and he lets me put them on his oh-so-warm legs!!  The point is, we express our love to each other constantly in the little things that we do for each other.  Maybe it’s because we have spent most of our marriage apart and we greatly appreciate the time we do get together…or maybe we are just a different kind of people that don’t get all caught up in the craziness of the world (that’s probably more like it…my hubs doesn’t even have a facebook account or know how to turn on a computer…).

Well, I’m done ranting and raving about this for now.  But seriously, before you run out and spend way more than you should on this lovely February 14^th, think about how you can show love to your special someone every day.  Peace and love to all, thanks for reading!